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Apr. 8th, 2013

growly wolvie

Hello!

Hey, Anybody still here?

It's been almost 4 four years since I've been on this thing.

Sep. 22nd, 2009

I've been nudged.....

Okay so it's been awile...

Hmm what to say?

Oooh I know! I just watched Austrailia for the first time last night and Hugh was HOT. I liked it!

I started homeschooling my three year old daughter. She is so smart! We only do three pages a day that involve coloring, counting and sounds. I'm going to add Flash cards soon.

Isabella now has six teeth and is standing up by herself for short periods of time. She is getting so big and is so beautiful. She's my little Bella Boo.

Jamie and I are doing great. We had our fourth anniversary on Sept. 16th. He took me to eat sushi and to see a movie. Then we rented a hotel room...hehe it was fun.p


I started writing a Twilight fic. It's been fun. That fandom is soooo huge.


Till next folks!

Love and hugs
Cassandra

Sep. 5th, 2009

Why is it so hard to find a beta?

I miss how everyone in the W/R fandom is so close but the Twilight fandom is another story altogether. It is HUGE! I can't find a beta that will get down on the personal level, yet there are a ton of people out there. ugh. I getting dishearten and all I wanna do is get this fic posted on a certain website!

Jul. 17th, 2009

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

I can't decided it I liked it or not!

Cut for SPOILERSCollapse )

Jul. 10th, 2009

Life!

Okay so my big girl, Kayla is turning three tomorrow! OMG! I can't believe it. She is such a big girl and so funny. We are renting on those space walk jumping things for her birthday party.

I bought my Harry Potter tickets early so I can't wait for that. It will be the first "date" my husband and I have had since we moved last month. It will be much needed! I love my babies but I need a break....and a date! haha.

Trying to put my family on a budget. Anyone have any good ideas? It's hard being a family of four on a single income. I'm thinking about selling Pampered Chef or something like that in order to bring in a little extra cash. If you have any STAY AT HOME mom jobs suggestions let me know.

I must mention that I'm addicted to Twilight FanFiction and I'm working on my own little piece. I haven't written in a LONG time. I really only read All-human twilight fio, for some reason I can't bring myself to read about vampires in the fanfic world because the original was so good to me. I'd like to recommend a story for you guys if you're interested. Something you should know is that in the TwiFandom they call smut, Lemons. When I first started reading I was like what in the world is with the word Lemon!? I caught on fast.

The Submissive by tara sue me, is explosive and smut filled and unlike anything that I have seen. it is a D/s fic and really introduced me and whole bunch of other women in the fandom to a different type of sex life. Trust me when I say its worth reading even if you are not interested in the fandom. Here is the authors summary:

Can Bella Swan warm and win the heart of dom, Edward Cullen, while living out her darkest fantasy? ADULT THEMES. AH, OOC.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4764216/1/The_Submissive

Jun. 18th, 2009

Lost In Finding the Way

Update....

Well things are going as well as can be expected. Jamie and I decided that even though the affair happened in Indiana and not anywhere near our house in Mississippi that we needed a change of scenery. We moved. We now have a little apartment (I love apartments!) in Marion which is 5 seconds from Meridian. It's so cute and we were able to layout our furniture and decorate whereas we weren't quite able to do that in our old house (weird floor plan). When we moved Jamie threw anything and everything away that had to with him being in Indiana/Nebraska. Fine by me, even though it doesn't take my thoughts away. I'm seeking counseling on that. I've learned that writing helps. ha! I should have know that from the start.

Jamie and I really are doing better. You know I truly didn't realize that we had drifted so far apart in the last year or so. Not just on his end but on my end also. Don't think I'm saying this is all my fault because its not, but I do believe that I pulled myself away from my husband and sort of pushed him away. I became so observed in some of my own issues that I didn't realize he was sinking into depression. In return, he's learned to communicate better with me about his feelings instead of "being a man" and keeping everything closed in and I'm learning to listen, truly listen and not blow him off.

It's funny that when people hear of our story most of the women just look at me and say, "I don't see how you do it. If that had been my husband his butt would be out the door and on the street and I wouldn't take him back!" While I would never wish this on my worst enemy, and some people probably wouldn't be able to handle it because it is HARD, but I honestly believe that if you truly love someone then you can forgive them. If not, then it would seem it wasn't real love in the first place. That's just me though.

Don't get me wrong. I am pissed. I'd like to think that huzzy can't sleep at night wondering whether or not she destroyed the lives of a woman and her two young children. I hope every time she hears Miranda Lamberts "More like her" that she feels like shit knowing that she wasn't me, could never be like me and that I AM better than her. After hearing how crazy that chick really is by other people I hope it comes around on her ten fold. She better be glad that I didn't sue her for alienation of affection.

Anyways I'm done with that rant. On to lighter things. I'm thinking about writing some twilight Fanfic....anyone read in that fandom?

May. 18th, 2009

Why does something terrible have to happen to turn something from good to great?

Long story short, my husband had an affair. A lot of crap has been happening since February. I started noticing a number on the phone bill. He told they were just friends, she told me the same thing. But none of the signs added up and I just that they had slept together. But what could I do? I had no proof so I let it go and moved forward. Jamie's job ended so he left that town and I thought I could let it go. (It wasn't that easy...a lot stuff happened and we almost got a divorce.)

But I kept having that nagging feeling that he wasn't telling me the truth. He never even truly apologized for lying to me about a lot things and if I tried to talk about it he would get angry. So I called her and asked her for the truth. She told they had been sleeping together since September and that she miscarried his child, that he said he loved her, she stayed with him for a few days while he was in Nebraska, he flew from Nebraska to Indiana for her birthday, that he sent her flowers for her birthday. That they got matching tattoos. She ended up being psycho literally so we had to change our phone numbers

Yet he still denied everything. So I sat him down and told them that I couldn't let this go until I told him that I forgive him for not telling me about her. I forgive him for when he wouln't stop talking to her when I asked. And I that I forgive him for the things that happened that I still didn't know about.

And we moved on. It's been great. We've talked better with each other, our sex life improved, we started to really enjoy each other again. Something we haven't done in a long time even before he started working in Indiana. But I still felt like I was the one that was being punished for someone else mistake. That was in March. We were split up for most of February.


Four Days ago we where driving home from some friends house when he grabbed my hand and told me that he loved me. Something in his voice told me that something was wrong so I looked up and smiled. His eyes were red and he looked as though he had been crying since we got in the truck.

He told me that he had something to tell me and it was very hard. Of course I knew what it was, so I just told him that I needed to hear him say it. And he admitted that he did have an affair. That he was truly sorry. He said that he had reached a low point and gave into temptation. He started working and got the taste of being single again had a moment of weakness. He told me that it meant nothing and that when he realized that he had messed up and wanted to make things right with me that she started threatening him. He didn't want me to know so he kept seeing her because she had threaten to fly here and show up at my house. My husband ended up having a fatal attraction affair. He told me that a lot of things that she told me was not the truth but that they did sleep together. He was very adamant that she never miscarried his child. But that did visit each other while he was in Nebraska.


I started crying and told him that I always knew that he had really did have an affair and that it does hurt, but that it finally felt like all the pieces of the puzzle fit and that made me feel better. Then the anger set in...not about the affair because I was already kind of over that but that fact that he made me feel like I was crazy for even thinking that for the last four months. He made me look stupid in front of so many of our friends and family.

I can't describe how it felt to hear him admit to it, and finally get the apology that I deserved. When I drove up to Indiana to confront him about the phone records he let me walk away think that he wanted to divorce me for something that he had done. He explained that he did that because he felt its was best for me to move on because he didn't deserve me anymore.

We stayed up till 4 o'clock in the morning just talking, crying, and getting things right and back on track. Now when I get in the morning its like waking up to a brand new man. He treats me totally different, and loves me the way I should be loved. And it's not like he's just trying to make up for the last nine months but that he genuinly realizes what he could have lost and is treating me with a new found respect.


Now the question is, how do I move forward with myself? Even though he says it meant nothing and that I'm truly what he wants, and that now when looks at me he see a beautiful woman on the inside and out. How do let go of those little thoughts where I want to compare myself to her? Am I better at sex than she is? I've had two kids, how can he find my body attractive compared to hers? Does he ever wish that I do something the way she did? Those kind of questions are in my head now.

Help anyone?

Apr. 2nd, 2009

Wolverine Blow Job.........No seriously

I don't know if this has ever been posted or not but I thought I'd come out of hiding to show all my Wolvie buddies out there.





Dec. 17th, 2008

Hellloooo.....

So I had a baby on Nov. 24th. Isabella Nichole was 9lbs and 1oz. She's a sweet baby. My first child was such a good baby that I was afraid this one was going to be horrible. But so far she's sleeping through the night and doesn't cry very often so I have been blessed! I'll post a picture soon.


And how about that Wolverine trailer? You wanna know what my favorite part is? All of Wolverine's flowing hair motion as he moves around. Watch it as he fighting Sabretooth. Its nice.

Sep. 26th, 2008

Black and White Rogan

Remember that one movie............

I'm not sure if this goes for everyone but you know there is always that one movie that turns a normal girl into a fan-girl. I would have thought that for me it was X-Men. That is until I saw something today that made me remember what it felt like to be a 13 year old girl who started lusting after a celebrity. It would not be until years later that I realized I was really lusting after the FICITONAL CHARACTER and not the person acting the part.

For me it all started on a Spring day in 1997 when I skipped school and ordered a movie on pay-per-view at my grandmothers. Without permission.



I was hooked. This led me to Titanic. Which then led me to Pearl Harbor and so on.......


But there will be nothing like all the pictures I put on the wall of Leonardo DiCaprio. *sigh* Those were the golden days.

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